singles day

Yesterday was 11/11.  Notice the ones in that date?  

All week my students were talking about the new Chinese custom of singles day, guāng gùn jié; a day of frenzied online shopping where popular retail websites offer cannot-pass-up deals, limited timed offers, and other irresistible enticements, racking up obscene financial gains that would make any capitalist cry with joy. 

What my students can't explain is if this day is a celebration of the solo life.  I have some doubts about this day because it seems counter productive for singles who want to be in a relationship to spend the day, alone, in front of the computer.

Me:  "So, are you single?" 
Girls: "YES!"
Me: "Why don't you have boyfriends?"
Girls: "giggle, giggle, no boys here and we want mature boys."
Me: ...hmmm, mature boys?

It's true there are few male students at this university; each of my classes only has 4 or 5 boys to 25 girls, and it's because this is a foreign languages school.  The Chinese believe that boys are bad at learning foreign languages.  This is a widely held belief and I even hear the teachers say it, including male teachers who are fluent in several languages.

Another Chinese belief is that girls must marry an older guy; he cannot even be a day younger.  My students tell me 5 to 10 years older is best, and they absolutely will not consider even dating a younger guy.  This comes up over and over.  For example a few weeks ago, I met a recently graduated guy with a great job at another university who was miserable because the girl he likes is a year older than him.  He knows it's hopeless.

I've heard variations on this reason:  the girls want a guy to take care of them and honor them.  Basically, it sounds like they want a guy to do their bidding.  One girl was bragging about how great her boyfriend is because he'll drop everything and run out to get her food anytime she's hungry.  That seems a little extreme, but who knows?  On a daily basis, I see  guys carry the girl's purse and bags everywhere.  American guys? Are you taking notes here?   

This foreign appliance cost almost $100,
and caused considerable confusion about it's use.
Ultimately, our explanation was filmed for future showings

How did I spend singles day?  Most PCVs are on the ultimate solo mission, but we are surrounded by a community and we try like crazy to integrate.  In the morning, exPCV Jason and I went to an English Corner with an "American style coffee shop" theme.  We taught them how to make coffee that they refused to drink, and then we went to a banquet lunch.  Later, I went to dinner with 2 students.  I talked all day, but I did no shopping.

Jason explains how to make coffee,
he doesn't even drink coffee.
Our version involved the microwave.

lunch banquet, always too much food

"Jack" my counterpart teacher,
also owns a successful translation business

some of Jack's employees and clients
Everyone's chopsticks go from the dishes to mouth,
and back again.  The little bowels: for rice. 

   

Chongqing art district

It's true,  pajamas are daywear in China--- like, walk around town clothes.
We think it's really funny, but we're not brave enough to actually buy them.

Where's the graffiti in China?  It's noticeably absent from the Chinese urban landscape.

Except, it's all over the buildings in Chongqing's art district, Huangjueping, so PCV Stephanie and I met up to take a look around on Saturday afternoon.  

The art district is a long street with graffiti buildings and wall, lots of artist studios and art supply stores, an art university, and an art museum.

working studio

artist studio

nothing arty about this view

on the campus of the art school

every building side is covered

sidewalk wall

Like all neighborhoods, the art district has an open-air market for buying food.  Shopping in these markets takes a stout stomach, an open mind, and decent negotiation skills.  Fortunately, Chinese numbers have specific hand gestures which makes communicating somewhat easier because the Chongqing dialect is hard to understand.  OK, it's impossible for me to understand.  

pajamas on the move

playing cards over the eggs

open-air bakery

mystery pieces and parts

easy to identify food

check-out the arm sleeve covers, VERY popular accessory 

long line of vendors

do they eat these? I don't want to know

these little girls were shocked to see us

dumpling day

a cook at vat of boiling water,
she throws dumplings and greens in

Today is the day to eat dumplings, my students tell me, because it's the start of winter, according to the lunar calendar.  Eating dumplings is part of The Dongzhi Festival or Winter Solstice, a tradition from northern China, the home of some of my students.

All I could think about was racing back to my apartment, hoping I had Internet, desperate for election results.  Yes, it's possible and necessary to pray for Internet.  Prayers and Internet were postponed for dumplings, the Chinese equivalent of fast food.

waiting for a table, with some of my students

more of my students

Since all students and most of the faculty live on campus, there are many little restaurants scattered all over the campus, and the students know which ones are good.  I eat with students several time a week, either for lunch or dinner, on or off campus.  It's great for me to learn more culture and food names, and it's good English practice for them.

jiaozi, cost about $1.25 

dipping sauce

another view of the kitchen

Finally, back to my apartment for the no-classes, nearly 3 hour daily rest break: 11:40-2:30, I get on the Internet, and I am beyond happy to see the Luna laws go down.  Thank you Idaho!  

Another traditional food for this time of year: rice balls.  I have a hard time getting past the slimy texture; they make me gag. 

birthday in China

tub o' fish

Last night, I had fish for dinner.  Nothing remarkable in that, except in China, you need to pick your fish from a bathtub-like container kept outside.  I see these tubs at stores, markets, and restaurants, and I usually don’t even look, but I did last night.

Every Monday, a group of us go to dinner, a sort of loose dinner club that gets us off campus and keeps us connected.  On this Monday night, we were at a restaurant in CiQiKou, and I was doing the fish picking, or rather, I was standing there looking dismayed, and so I took pictures, relieved that the tub actually looked clean, it had aeration, and the fish were…. lively? Is that the word for flopping fish about to be killed?

weighing the fish, you pay by the weight

Our Monday night out this week was my birthday celebration.  Depending on the time zone, my birthday is either today (China) or tomorrow (Boise).  China has only 1 time zone, completely ignoring any complications that the variation in daylight hours might cause people.  China spans 5 geographic time zones, but since 1949, only uses 1 time, Beijing Time, also known as Chinese Standard Time.   

Naturally, our meal was another lesson in Chinese food and culture. Chongqing grilled fish is a spicy-hot specialty and we had to find a restaurant that served it.   Basically, its grilled fish served in a vat of oil with a few vegetables, and it look terrible.  To me, it takes like all spicy food here; I can’t really tell if I like it because my mouth is both on fire and numb. 

the kitchen. yes, we still ate here

discussing the fish dish, typical restaurant table

hand warmer, oh so cute

teachers from US, Ireland, France, and China

putting out the fire

Chongqing grilled fish

Still, it was a fun night.  My surrogate PC site mate, Jason, gave me a cute hand warmer, like an old fashioned water bottle, except this plugs in to heat up, perfect for keeping my toes warm while I’m on the computer. 

My Internet has been very sketchy this week, and my vpn hasn’t work at all.  Witopia helped me build another custom gateway to get out.  Now I can get on this blog, the NY Times, and Facebook.  But, who knows how long that will last.  Another PCV was having trouble too, and sent out this message: 

(From Witopia Tech Support) 

thanks mom and dad!

"China has locked down alot of locations due to their government meetings.. this is affecting ALL vpn companies.. you will have to test various locations and protocols to see what is working for you... it is varying from location to location inside china which ones are working.  This should resolve itself once the communist congress stops meeting in a week or so.  This is NOT targeted to WiTopia, we are hearing from all providers and they are all having the same issues."

freezing at 68 degrees

giving speeches in small groups

The temperature right now is about 68 degrees F, I think it’s just like Boise today, except for the humidity here.  This morning when I walked to class at 7:30 a.m., it was maybe 60 degrees. This is Thursday and I walk up Gele Mnt. after class, and then I walk down to the shops for groceries, a good loop that takes 2 hours, including 20 minutes for shopping.  I dress for teaching and walking, so today I wore capris, a blouse, and walking shoes; it’s on the really casual side for China, but ok teaching.

most of my students are girls

In Boise, when it’s this warm, everyone runs around in light clothes, no coats, right?  Here, everyone is bundled up in sweaters, coats, scarfs, heavy tights, and boots.  But, not me.  I’m dressing Boise-weather appropriate and it’s causing people to say things like; “you’re dressed like it’s summer!” or “take care!”  Girls and women of all ages wear ridiculously short shorts, but now they wear them with tights (...a look I’m not sure about).  I’m boldly going bare legged with my dresses and capris.

Their concern comes from the Chinese belief in yin-yang balance for good health.  There’s a cultural believe that being cold will lead to sickness.  Has this belief been part of our culture too?  Didn’t our mothers say, “Bundle-up, or you’ll catch a cold.”? 

One source explains:

Food is viewed as important in maintaining the bodyʼs balance of yin (cold) and yang (hot). Imbalance is believed to cause illness (e.g., consuming cold fluid with oily food is believed to cause diarrhea). Yin foods include fruits, vegetables, cold liquids, and beer. Yang foods include meats, eggs, hot fluids, oily and fried foods. Some foods are used to treat illness or disease.

Ok, so I eat almost exclusively on the yin side.

This past summer when I was sick for a few weeks, the host family blamed the cold water they gave me.  They kept saying this over and over.  At the time, I thought: this makes no sense, cold drinks don't make people sick; we drink iced everything in the U.S.  I also couldn't understand why they kept the boiled water hot in the thermos when it was blistering hot inside and outside their apartment.  Now that I know more about their beliefs in yin-yang, I understand their logic, but I still don't believe it.

This week, our PC Chongqing program manager sent an email to us, explaining that she will see us soon, apologizing for not coming sooner.  She and her family have had terrible health problems.  I’m glad she shared her experiences, and cautioned us with this preventative advice:

Finally I would like to take this opportunity to share the following lessons with you based on my experience with sickness and my sister’s misfortune of being hit by the road:

1.       No matter how busy you are, please put aside at least one hour every day for physical exercise/sports to keep yourself strong enough to fight against virus.
2.       Please stay warm by wearing more clothes and keep your glass windows fully closed at night when you are sleeping.
3.       Wear scarf.
4.       When you feel your face, neck or ears chilled, please rub them till warm, or take a hot shower right away, if possible.
5.       Please don’t buy things by the road where there are motored vehicles running (While my sister was buying apples by the road of her residence compound, she was hit by a motored tricycle, and five ribs were broken and the lung was prickled by broken bones. This happened in mid September. She had the operation and now in the process of recovery).
6.       Live a healthy life and don’t stay up late at night.
7.       Be cheerful and don’t let stress rule over you no matter what happened.
I feel very grateful that nothing is fatal for my sister and me. And I have learned another lesson to be always positive and cheerful. Every day of our life is so precious and we must take good care of ourselves first if we want to take care of others. J

I really like #7, an excellent reminder to live well! Thank you!

Happy… happy… “how do you say Halloween?”

Inspiration hits, calls, texts, and emails go out, a loose, but enticing plan is made, and events are set in motion without really, truly thinking it through.  And that’s what I was thinking when I found myself sitting in the front seat of a cab in my bathrobe, with a shower cap on, with a yogurt and oatmeal facial dripping from my face - a totally thrown together Halloween costume from whatever was at hand, and no way to explain the situation in Chinese.

Part of the Chinese culture is to stare at whatever interests them.  If it’s a foreigner, they state the obvious, "Laowai!" (foreigner!), or “Look, it’s a foreigner!”  The bolder ones will yell, “HELLO!” followed by lots of hilarious laughter.  This is part of my daily life.  I usually wear my headphones and try to ignore it.  I only get upset when "HELLO!"  happens on my campus because, come on, this is an international school, this is my home base, please give me a moment of peace.

For the first time since I’ve been here, the costumed PCVs rendered the staring Chinese mute.  When we walked out of Stephanie’s apartment and down the street to get cabs, not a single, "Laowai!" or “HELLO!” This was Saturday night, and 8 of us, including a few plain clothed, shocked Chinese friends, were heading to an American bar, creatively called “Foreigners.”  One of the bar owners also teaches English at Stephanie’s university, and he promised a free bottle of something if we showed up.  That’s all it took.

After we sorted out the cab situation and we were on our way, I thought I should say something to the driver since he was staring at me and driving headlong into oncoming traffic.  A little too late, I realized I don’t know how to explain Halloween in Chinese, I don’t even know the word for party!
     I asked him if he knew Halloween ("Ni zhidao Halloween ma?").
     Don't know ("Bu zhidao").  
     So, I continued with the usual: "We are university English teachers from America,” as if that explained everything.  
     He just said, “OK, OK” and went on with his insane driving.
I was expecting, but didn't get: I don't understand ("Wo ting bu dong").  This is my only language goal: do not use, and do not hear, "Wo ting bu dong."  

The thing about being a foreigner is that it’s easy to meet other foreigners; we all stand out.  Just like the Chinese, Jason will say “laowai” to any non-Chinese person he sees, and he makes friends easily that way.  We met some new foreigners that night, but mostly we filled the bar with the people we already knew. 

Stephanie, feeling moved by the Halloween spirit, starting planning a party at her university for next year.  She spent the night talking to everyone, gathering ideas, and taking pledges for help and stuff that no one will remember in a week, much less a year away.  Still, her enthusiasm is positive energy, and I’m feeling a little bad, just a little, that I didn’t plan any Halloween event here.  But, Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming up! Hmmmm, I wonder what I can do?

An impressive good-person story came out of that night.  Another foreign teacher at my university left her wallet in a cab.  The cab driver called the university, drove out here, returned it to her, and didn’t want anything for his honesty or trouble.  Now that's good karma!  She did manage to leave some money in his cab for him.